Last night I was watching a documentary on Discovery Health called the ¬? ton man.
This is an amazing story of a man that literally had to be cut out of the side of his bed room and taken to a hospital to lose weight. One of the side stories here is that he ate exclusively McDonald’s burgers for a good part of the last year before he was removed. Someone had to get them for him and here in lies the title of this post. Why would someone continue to bring this to him even though he was over 1000 pounds and couldn’t move?
To do this someone needed to be an enabler in order to (excuse the pun) “feed the addiction”. Someone knowing that this was killing him continued to do more harm by getting the next Big Mac. Could any of you in this same situation do the same? We collectively share our heads at something like this and proclaim that we couldn’t possibly do something like this. Yet are we as free from this type of behavior to feel we can pass judgment?
How may of us buy a bottle of alcohol for a spouse, parent or significant other simply because the drunkenness is better than the fight? How about the woman that takes the next beating and doesn’t turn the abuser in? How about the loved one of a gambler that works 2 jobs so that they can support this habit? Or maybe the person that gives some money to somebody in debt and knows that they have a shopping problem. A mother that buys the candy for the child just so the whining doesn’t continue.
Do you act as an enabler? Do you give in even when you know the consequences may be bad? Do you do it just because you’re tired of the fight? Hey this could be as simple as giving the family dog some scraps from the table or an extra treat since you know taught him to whine for it in the first place. Do you know someone that enables? Drop a comment here if you have an experience from trying to do the right thing or know someone that does this.


7 Comments until now
Not an enabler here! Don’t make friends as easily with honesty, however
That’s part of the downside of, “Do no harm!”
I saw that man before in the news. It makes me scared of eating calories rich food and do more work outs. Thanks for reminding me again of that man.
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I am caught in the middle…working on it! I appreciate the honest approach though!
I saw that show too. It was amazing – and the guy was angry and was convinced that he ate like a “normal” person. (at least one that they highlighted…I think it was THE one). No, no you didn’t from what I saw you eat on the show. But that wasn’t seeing him day to day.
I have been an enabler in the past. It was with an ex boyfriend with cigaretts…I’m ashamed that I did that instead of getting rid of a person that could only deal with an addiction by being verbally abusive! But it’s hard to watch someone suffering and it’s easy to give in.
However, I could not see my hubby or me doing it if it was one of us at that weight. Yet, when we’re struggling with losing weight (even if it’s “only” 50 lbs) we still get fast food for our loved ones. Why? Why the does doing it 900 lbs seem wrong but at 50 lbs overweight it’s not as bad? You get there by slowly increasing the amount….so we need to do things now I suppose is the answer. What a great conversation starter!
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Thanks for right approach Dr. J
Mark, Diana,
You’re not alone. I have an issue that I need to deal with and it and I may not be popular after.
Thanks for the responses.
I saw that same show! I’ve seen others too, where the mom is as big as a house, and relies on her teenage daughter to shop and bring her food. She says she can’t work because of her size, yet routinely asked the daughter to bring her a family size bucket of fried chicken!
It’s crazy!
Bizs last blog post..I’ll feel it tomorrow!
I am guilty of enabling…ack!
Though I used to be guilty-er.
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